Dance life!

A few months ago Kota took her first tiny tip-toed steps towards her future involving all things dancey and tutu-y and ballet-slippery and pretty-pretty-princess-tiara-y. I signed her up for Mommy and Me ballet class! Now this action was not a flippant, "every little girl must do this so I guess we should sign you up too," type thing. It was a well thought out, deeply researched, overly emotionally packed "I'll spend a few Saturdays in a row at the local dance clothes store just to make sure I get you the RIGHT leotard" situation. Totally normal for a 2 year old's, one day per week, half hour class. Totally.

I'll forget about the fact that I really didn't like the teacher after class 1 (where we had an awesome substitute instead of the usual chick who I wanted to punch in the face). I'll also forget about how judgmental I was of this "studio!" It was one of those types of places where kids can do anything and everything under the sun but none of the training is that great, you know? Like a jack of all trades but master of none type places? Yeaaaaaaaah we won't be attending there past Mommy and Me because obviously I can't have my daughter being taught that mediocrity in disciplines such as ballet is okay! NOOOOOO! Lastly, I'll forget about how I spent WAYYYYY too long trying to pick out the best and cutest purple leotard/tutu for her big first day and wouldn't you know it?? IT WENT MISSING! We've found it since, but I had to put her in this old tutu that's still super cute but not THE one.

Anyhoo, she did great, her little buddy Ella did great and us two moms (who were two of the three moms who were participating in this MOMMY and me class) were super proud. I realized that Kota really is one hell of a tan child under fluorescent lighting and that she can totally coupe. COUPE! Super proud dance mom, over here!

 ^^^Doing the "seal" with Miss Cynthia!

It was the best!!!!!!

Coach Chad the Dad!

Hey-o for an enormously productive day! Thanks to us completely running out of every morsel of acceptable breakfast food after the weekend, I got the kids going at 7:30 am for an early morning Corky's breakfast date, went to Stroller Strides, hit the mall for some post-class camaraderie, swung through Trader Joe's for an epic grocery haul, sprinted through Albertson's for laundry detergent and wipes, cleaned out the car once we got home and got the kiddos into quiet/nap time after an awesome lunch! Woo!

Okay but what trumps the epicness of today was this awesomeness: Carter getting to tell EVERYONE that we got to "Meet the Coach" for his first AYSO soccer team - "I got to meet my DAD!!!!!! MY DAD IS THE COACH!" 

Yes! Chad came home a few weeks ago and let us know that he will be coaching Carter's first soccer team. I almost cried. On Saturday we had the first event where everyone got to meet their coach at the local elementary school. It was an hour long meeting where we all first sat in a half-hour-long power point presentation (all of us meaning a million families with young children who were NOT interested in hearing about how "once your child becomes a star player around 8 years old, they will be tapped for All Stars." Oh thanks! NEEDED to know that while trying to quiet down my insanely bored 2.5 year old!). After listening to the way-amped commissioner, we all broke up into small groups to meet each other. Let me tell you, our team is boss. 

Team name? NINJA TURTLES! Team Manager? An awesome dad! Kids activity while we all talked? Playing tag! We're off to a good start with ole' Coach Chad the Dad. Pretty excited about it. 

Gooooooooo Ninja Turtles! Now get out there and kick some U5 ass!!!!!!!! We do not do fun. We do winning. The league does not keep score at this age but you better believe that we will. No goal = running laps. LIFE LESSONS SHALL BE LEARNED AND WE WILL HAVE FUN WHILE DOING IT, DAMNIT!

He-he-ho-ho! I keed, I keed. Stoked for some entertaining Saturdays at Wagsdale Park! Woo! And how cute are these bubble blowin', messy haired, undies donning, sticky-from-running-around all day, on-the-verge-of-being-potty-trained maniacs? Yay for 2.5 and 4.5!

Summer afternoon randomness

Okay Fall, come to mama! It's time to arrive with all of your coziness. As much as we've loved this insanely awesome Summer, it's time to slow down. Bake a few treats. Enjoy some pairs of boots. Go back to preschool (or TK). Look forward to Halloween. Begin the storage of the birthday/Christmas gifts at my parents' house (shopping for which will begin next week -- INSANITY!).

This Summer was one of many hallmarks. First of all, they are just OLD now! They can play like wild animals without mom following closely. I've literally spent about 40% of the last few months sun bathing while watching Carts and Kots run out every ounce of energy at various splash pads, resulting in the first official tan in over 5 years. Swimming? Carter's got it down. Spending 4+ hours outdoors in a row? Nailed it. I feel like we hit this year so hard starting at such an early date (hanging out at the pool began somewhere in late April), that I'm A-OK with packing it up.

Anyway. What else is going on around here? Oh! We've decided to go back and open up a Costco membership -- we're inching towards being able to actually consume that much food. Well, Carter can at least. It's insane how much he can eat now. TWO bowls of oatmeal in the morning? Half a pack of lunch turkey in one sitting? Holy cow, what's it going to be like in a mere 5 years? Are we going to have to kill a new cow every week?? We'll be living near quite a few farms coming up here soon soooooo that shouldn't be a problem. Just a quick drive down the freeway and we'll be set! Anyhoo. That should be enough rambling for one awkwardly long computer sit-down. Happy Sunday!

Extreme childcare and red lips, a few of life's larger achievements this week

This week the kids and I have conquered beasts. Slayed dragons. Climbed Mt. Everest. Successfully completed 20 marathons back-to-back. Went for IT. CONQUERED!

Okay, so we watched my sisters children. All THREE of them. ME - ME AND MY TWO BABES WATCHED THREE OF THEIR COUSINS AGES 5, 4, 2, 1 and 2.5 MONTHS!! It surely is something that will go down in history as the day where the woman Cisneros walked around the streets of Ladera Ranch with 4 children strategically placed upon her double BOB stroller and a practical new born was worn upon her body. It truly was a magical few hours where people were reminded that yes, yes it is possible to achieve tasks once thought impossible. Anyway, it had been in the back of my mind to ask my poor sister laden down by so many children under the age of 5 if she would like me to watch her babes (after repeatedly saying, "Hey G! Anytime you want me to watch any of them, let me know!" which really means, "Hey I'm offering, but that thought sort of scares the shit out of me."), but I just couldn't figure out a decent way to do it. Should I take all three? WOAH. Should I take the two older ones? Would that defeat the point of giving her a break? Then I decided to just go for it and give her some time off. I texted her on Monday and said I would be over there the next day at promptly at 2:00 to pick up those babes and we wouldn't see her again until 4:00. On Tuesday, right around 1:45, I was wondering what the hell I had been thinking. I was legitimately nervous! Anyhoo, we spent 1 hour at the park right next to us then 1.5 hours at the park a little farther away, all achieved through walking. WALKING! I'm sure we were a sight to be seen. But it went great and I'm glad we did it, gosh darnit! When I dropped them off, good ole' Gina treated me to a cappuccino latte? One of those things with the foam on top. Delicious treats from a rested, newly-pedicured woman!

Another massive accomplishment from the week involved lipstick. Lip STAIN if we're going to get technical. YOU GUYS. The only time I have ever successfully worn lipstick was onstage during dance competitions and one other time I'd like to forget about (teeth. Teeth and red were involved). Anyway, I went out for a girls' dinner the other night with a few ladies from high school, and this one chick was there I didn't know with the cutest, CUTEST red lip. Anyway, after trying not to stare, I dug out the information that she works for Sephora so that's where the lip stain was from (I concluded). Off I went to good ole' Seph and found out it was only $13 - total win! Oddly nervous, I told Chad that I was going to do a red lip challenge for a week just to get used to wearing some gosh darn color. The next day I came home from Stroller Strides, took a shower, applied more make up around the eyes than was actually needed (my logic was to counter the shock of the lip?), and SWIPED. I was a red-lipped woman the whole rest of the day. Now I never actually left the house, per se, but it was still a major accomplishment. I was again weirdly nervous for Chad to get home from work. When he did I struck some dramatic pose and then the night went on as usual. Now here's the thing: I don't know what was up with this wild thing called "Real Red" from the Seph, but it gave me more energy. It really did! I was so even-tempered while giving the kids a bath I wondered what sort of drug had been leaked into our apartment through the overly-used air vents. I also kept casually walking into any bathroom that was near me to take another look at myself. Oh and did I mention that Monday is laundry day? So I was rocking these old running shorts and a wife beater with my red lips and dark eye makeup... Soooo yeah. But even with that, it felt awesome! After such success, I didn't really feel the need to walk around the house with the redness the rest of the week - confidence be found! Woohoo to that!

^^^Not of the picture of the red lip goddess day, but rather a "Carter come take a picture with mom... Oh okay, that heart you're holding up is fine too," type photo.

In the playing-around-with of these pictures, I had envisioned a way deep, this-is-the-meaning-of-life post, but hey! Extreme adventures in childcare and red lip stains are just as appropriate! Woohoo!

Oh the things I hear

Out of no where I got knocked over sideways with this creepy cold. A COLD! In the middle of the Summer! What the heck - I am not okay with this ridiculousness. The babes only got the faintest hints of a few coughs here and there, while I'm over here just trying to breathe like a normal person. Anyway, last night I literally got ZERO rest. Absolutely none. I kept having these strange anxiety dreams that seemed to be mixed into the fact that I couldn't breathe for the life of me without immediately needing a glass of water. An example would be this: I kept thinking/dreaming about the part in The Fault In Our Stars where she had to be rushed to the hospital because her body wasn't getting enough oxygen. I don't know - totally weird. I kept envisioning myself passing out and not being able to breathe and no one knowing because it was the middle of the night! What the hell was going on with me? I'm actually laughing as I'm writing this. What was going on up in here?

Anyhoo, aforementioned horrible night left me WAY exhausted today. I was fine up until about 3:30, at which point I told both babies that I couldn't play "construction site" anymore because mommy doesn't feel well. I promptly took a seat on the couch like a responsible parent and basically fell asleep. I kept coming to when hearing a few hilarious things the babes were talking about:

Carter: Kota, you called me DARLING! I'm not your BABE!
Kota: What? Hahahaha
Carter: That's what Mommy calls Daddy all the time!
(We do not call each other darling :)

Kota: Batman, watch out for my BUTT!
Carter: Hahahaha move your butt, I'm throwing blocks at Mommy!
Kota: OKAY!
(We do not say butt so it's by default the most hilarious thing in their vocabularies :)

Kota: MOMMY! Watch I'm playing basketball! (Throwing a big bouncy ball up the stairs)
Carter: So am I, watch me! (Nails Kota in the head with a tennis ball)
Kota: BATMAN! I tell you to STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!! (In literally the loudest, body-shaking, scream voice I've ever heard)
Carter and Kota: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Oh man. These two! They are in the most hilarious ages of all time. OF ALL TIME!

WIDN

Instagram pics deserve an Instagram-like hashtag, eh? At this moment Chad and the kiddos are eating breakfast at Corky's with my the bro-in-law and their kiddos before they head over to turn in both familys' oldest childrens' birth certificates for AYSO soccer in the Fall for proof of age. (Anyone for complicated, run-on sentences?) At this moment, I should be filing away a hundred different documents, but I think my time is better spent during this rare alone time documenting our early Summer happy-moments. At this moment, I'm thinking about how amazing it is that Chad has had every single Saturday off since the first week of May - I mean, it's huge - freeing us to experience true weekend "vacation of the mind" modes thoroughly. At this moment I'm really digging this June gloom - weather here in the big LR could not be more enjoyable.

Currently I'm thinking about how I've been making a concerted effort lately to be more organized and on top of the household duties, mainly because these weekends have been so gosh darn awesome, I would rather spend them in cleanliness versus an ew-I-don't-want-to-enter-the-kids-room-because-it-will-remind-me-how-I-haven't-vaccumed-in-a-fortnight type thing. You know? I will say, closet organization is the most underrated activity in America. Also another cool fact about me sitting here among organization: I don't feel like I'm overwhelmed with toys and kid paraphernalia - a fact I never knew existed until I removed most of the junk! Woohoo to that! This should also include the REAL reason I've been organizing: one of my best friends from way back when I was Carter's age comes on Tuesdays and Thursdays to watch the kids while I'm at Purebarre, just until the end of the Summer, so... you know. Can't be having a filthy house! It has to at least APPEAR as if I was aware that there were at least three, jumbo sized EMPTY boxes of diapers in the babes' closet collecting dust...

This post is slowly turning into a I-really-don't-want-to-be-doing-what-I-should-be-doing-so-let-me-tell-you-about-cleaning-my-closets...

Anyhoo, I just got confirmation that we'll be heading out to Palm Springs to hang at the sister-in-law's house after this quick PB meeting I have, Target and running through Buy Buy Baby! Better get down to business lol or else I'll feel like a major lame-o all weekend. Don't you hate when you know you have something you SHOULD be doing but you just don't want to do it?? That's me right now. Motivation, Nicole, motivation! Anyway, woohoo to a great weekend and having a blast with our two sweet babes!

Some kids, man

WARNING: horribly mean, probably below-the-belt blog post.

You know what? Some kids are just little shits! Yes - what a terrible thing to say as a mother to two toddlers, both of whom may or may not be little poops themselves every once in awhile - but really. For some odd reason, I've been coming into contact with some seriously inappropriate children lately and have become ridiculously worked up due to my own kids not knowing what to do in the face of such absurdity (mama's advice? Smack them up side the head! Okay no, but... come on. My only form of solace is that Carts and Kots have no idea what to make of these little creeps because such behavior is not tolerated around here - proud mom!). An example, you say?

Okay. Yesterday at the little kiddie pool a block from home, there were these three little ones who kept calling a fourth little boy a zombie who was visibly frustrated that they kept doing so. After awhile, the boys parents took him out of the pool and left, probably because they were not happy about witnessing their poor child being picked on! Guess who was the next zombie? CARTER! I was so pissed because (I kid you not) Carter never has issues with other children. I know, I know - totally something a biased mom would say, but it's such a rarity to see my dude not getting along with someone that I can't even come up with one specific non-smooth social interaction beyond the point of being a baby. After a few minutes, Carter, completely innocently, told me that he didn't know why those guys were calling him "zombie" because that was not his name and he didn't like it. My heart broke at the same time my head screamed, "yeah, they're total brats - don't worry honey, I'll go give their mothers a piece of my mind!" I tried to explain to him what a zombie was and that maybe they were playing a game, so don't worry about it and play with sister, but he was just not getting why he wasn't playing with these like-aged children and not having fun! I told him to tell them to stop calling him that if he didn't like it - which he did forcefully but not rudely, woo! - to which the two little nicer ones responded but the bad-seed-ring-leader ignored. WHAT A BRAT! After SEVERAL glances towards the the two moms who must be responsible for these three (who were talking face to face without a glance to their babies who were just floating around an enormous pool), I extremely loudly and obviously told Carter and Dakota to get out of the pool because WE DON'T WANT TO PLAY WITH KIDS WHO DON'T WANT TO PLAY NICE (and that we had to go make dinner).

WTH, brats?!

Rest assured there have been a few more situations where I've repeatedly thought, "Wow, you're a total shit, get it together," but I really can't think of what they are due to me getting slightly worked up from writing aforementioned pool situation. Anyway, the only thing I can do is make sure that my babies know how to handle themselves in such situations and that I, too, know how to handle myself in the face of some seriously lame parents. I mean, I'm not the type of person who would completely forget all forms of social decency and go screaming after a parent because their toddler is in dire need of some rules and boundaries, but sheesh, man. It's tough to not claw someone's face off when it comes to your kids!

Woo!